Stream of Consciousness

 I thought I had everything figured out after the course on Existentialism. I was wrong. 

I thought that I control everything in my life. I just need to be confident and not care about what people say. I need to enjoy being myself. 

It's not easy. It's not easy to not care about what other people say. Other people are always there, no matter how much we try to erase them. 

We are constantly in each other's life. People can be mean (and I have never been on social media!). People tell me - 'You're precious. You still have that innocence of childhood'. I don't want to lose it. 

But it's so easy to say - 'Believe in yourself. Just be confident.'

What is actually real? Who is saying this? Do they decide things? What is the eternal truth?

What can I hold onto no matter what? Everything I do is something we've created for ourselves. Is there anything beyond? Is there any sense to this in the big picture. 

God is there. Who said it? We said it. Is there anything other than us? We don't know. 

Is there a purpose to life?

Camus , of course said, that life is meaningless, but this predetermined "losing" can be made fun by keeping ourselves busy. 

I am so tired of the world. Of these people. I am tired of how much people matter to me, even though I say they don't. 

Chaotic.


Comments

  1. Anjali Paruvu1 July 2021 at 21:53

    Not a very uplifting post. Happy July, anyways! :)

    ReplyDelete
  2. Harimohan4 July 2021 at 01:51

    Ah, thanks Anjali for the July post. I think I used to have these thoughts too. Guess we never have clear answers and in the end it is what we make of it like you said. My current position is that it is not one or the other, and it is a bit of everything, and it is up to us to make what we can of it. Adapt, adjust and go with the flow. And have a good time while you're at it if you can!

    ReplyDelete
  3. Unknown4 July 2021 at 22:23

    Anjali all undergo this where you are not happy with people .nor are we happy without them.with time we gradually adapt and adjust and still be ourselves.

    ReplyDelete

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