au revoir

 I thought I was out of cryptic notes

and I am

Somehow this knife it don't hurt

It seems to collapse in on itself


And I've hurt before

And the memories of pain still flash

and I don't have it all sorted out

but darling, one thing's for sure


You're the ex who'll never leave

You're the best friend who hates on me

You're the one who makes me want to scream

You're the one who no longer has a say on me


Taylor might write songs about her boyfriends

but the best one I've read was the one with blood in the title

If you can teach me how to fight, then one day I'll be a pro

Till then, its au revoir my friend

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Cast-e Your Eye Over : Happy Ambedkar Jayanti

Image
This one has been a long time coming. I've hesitated to write this blog for years now. Every time I hear the word 'caste' I get an uneasy feeling. Before, that uneasy feeling used to be fear and embarrassment. Who discusses such things? Today, it's guilt. It's guilt for not expressing my position so far. It's guilt for letting every casteist remark slide. It's guilt for not having the courage to challenge the narrative of our upper-class friends. It's guilt for being quiet. It's guilt for being ashamed.  My first interaction with caste was with my civics textbook. I'd heard the infrequent comment at school. 'Nuvvu Reddy caste aa?' or a 'We are proud Brahmins' was not unheard of. But it felt like everyone knew the history of the caste system. It was something that existed ages ago. In today's society, caste didn't matter. As one of my teacher's put it, today, when you go to eat a meal in a restaurant, do you care what c
Read more

Over the MUN

Image
I used to scoff at the "MUN kid" stereotype. Obnoxious, bratty, condescending. "You don't know that also aa?"  I was not that kid. I was the kid who aced the tests, who would write an opinionated essay but whose ears would block out when handed a microphone. The one that said 'phew' after getting off stage. Going from that to winning awards at Model United Nations conferences was a plot twist Abbas-Mustan couldn't have predicted. 2023 was just one new experience after the other and I forgot to sit back for a minute and reflect on how much I'd changed. It was when my first grade teacher Kamakshi Aunty commented on a profile photo of me addressing a gathering saying "I'm so glad you finally overcame your fear of public speaking" that I realised that a change had happened at all.  In kindergarten, I was given an important set of lines in a skit for Independence Day. I came to school lines in hand, stuffed into an uncomfortable Nehru co
Read more

Existential Philosophy : Karim Benammar

Image
 As part of my 'Introspection Summer', I signed up for three courses on Udemy, and completed one. 'Existential Philosophy' by Karim Benammar. It not only provided clarity as to existential crises and purpose, but opened up a whole new world of freedom and choice.  Why are we alive? There are two questions that we seek the answers to. How to make a living and How to give shape to our life. We have answered the first question through careers, and providing for our families. We have a world of abundance, where survival is no longer our primary purpose. We have time and energy to do other things, which brings us to the question 'How do we give shape to our life?' Throughout our lifetime we are simply becoming who we are. We are free to live authentically. We are free to sculpt our life, but that is a responsibility, and newsflash says - 'That's scary!'. Why are you alive? That question can make your life meaningful and enjoyable. The answer is to b
Read more